Showing posts with label Jerks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jerks. Show all posts

March 22, 2011

Today's Tune: "Shitlist" By L7 And William Shatner Sings Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You!"


Happy Birthday William Shatner! Mr. Shatner was born on March 22, 1931. He is most well known for starring in the original Star Trek television series (1966 - 1969), as well as in several Star Trek films. However, he has done so much more, as an actor, author, director and producer. Our 'Today's Tune' double feature focuses on more recent history.

First up is "Shitlist" (1992), by L7. This song sprang to mind due to Bill's recent CBS comedy TV show named Shit My Dad Says, which is based on Justin Halpern's Twitter site also named Shit My Dad Says. This choice isn't meant as a slight on the show's quality level. On the contrary, I quite like it myself. The only person recently solidifying his position on my shitlist is Pittsburgh Penguins' out-of-control NHL forward Matt Cooke.

I've never liked Cooke, and his latest transgression, for which he has been awarded a lengthy suspension, has only deepened the already strong hatred in my heart. So, this one's for you, MC Douche Bag.

I'm not sure how Bill Shatner would react if he were to witness Matt Cooke's maliciousness, but he provides the second half of today's double dipper. You see, Shatner is also a singer. Click here for his complete discography. His special cover of Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You!" (2010) could just as well have been directed at Cooke. As a matter of fact, maybe the league should force Matt Cooke to listen to Shatner's performance repeatedly for a few hours. You know, as an added bonus punishment. He's certainly earned it. Sorry Bill, that does seem like a slight on your musical talents, doesn't it?


December 1, 2009

Today's Tune: "You Don't Fool Me" By Queen

1996 single "You Don't Fool Me" first appeared on 1995 album 'Made In Heaven'.

The jurors of the theft trial for Baltimore, Maryland's Mayor Sheila Dixon announced their verdict on the charges against her today. Dixon was accused of stealing from the poor, via gift cards that were supposedly meant to go to the needy.

Although they did find her guilty on one count of fraudulent misappropriation, she got off lucky, I think. At first, I believe she denied using the cards. When proof that she spent them was dug up, the possibly soon to be former mayor said she thought the gift cards were a gift for her. I don't think Ms. Dixon lied about that part. I was sure from the start, they were meant for her, as a part of a much larger payoff.

It's a damn shame. Sheila Dixon seemed like she was willing to work hard for the city of Baltimore. But then, at first anyway, so did the last pratt to hold the office, Martin O'Malley. Next in line is current City Council President Stephanie Rawlings-Blake, who will be interim mayor during Dixon's suspension while waiting for an official decision on her fate. Let's hope she can hold her corruption to a minimum.

Don't worry, I'm done my little rant. Now comes the good part. To pick an appropriate song (sort of close, anyway) for this December 1st 'Today's Tune', I didn't have to think very hard. Let's all get into the intoxicating and rhythmic beat of the oh so sexy jam, "You Don't Fool Me" by Queen.



Queen - "You Don't Fool Me"

May 8, 2009

Shame On You!


There was a lot of stupid unnecessary drama and shameful actions (and sometimes lack of action) by the opponent, referees and league officials going on during the first round of the 2009 NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs, while the Washington Capitals were playing against the New York Rangers. Now that the Capitals are up against the Pittsburgh Penguins in the second round, they are facing the same old tricks, complaining and injustices again.

Shame on Sidney Crosby for whining so much. Legitimate complaints would be fine, but crying about everything that doesn't go the way he wants is pathetic.

Shame on Kris Kunitz for the intentional two handed cross check to the throat of Simeon Varlamov in Semifinal Game 2.

Shame on Colin Campbell and the NHL for not suspending Kunitz. Fining him a lousy $2,500.00 isn't going to bother him one bit, and it's out of proportion to the suspensions they gave to Donald Brashear for his actions versus the Rangers.

Shame on the Penguins for their playoff game ticket giveaway screw up. Once tell someone they've won a prize, it's wrong to take it back.

Shame on the Penguins for complaining about something they themselves are guilty of.

Shame on the Penguins for making false accusations about faceoff cheating, illeagle pics and sticks just to wrongfully sway the thoughts of on ice officials.

Shame on the refs for being swayed by all the Penguins B.S.

Shame on the Penguins for complaining about officiating, when it's the Capitals who are the ones that have a right to complain.

Shame on CBC for broadcasting the Capitals coaching staff's game plan board with their keys to victory for Wednesday's Game 3 against the Penguins.



Dio - "Shame On The Night"

April 28, 2009

The Rangers Should "Expect No Mercy"!

Matt Bradley celebrates Game 5 goal at Capitals bench.
April 24, 2009 photo by Getty Images.

There's been a lot of useless and unwarranted drama on and off the ice during the first round of the 2009 NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs. Especially in the series between the Southeast Division Champion Washington Capitals and the New York Rangers.

The Rangers, who just barely made it into the playoffs, have tried all sorts of mind games, dirty tricks and misleading accusations to distract the much more well equiped Capitals from focusing on their goal.

Sure, they may have a right to be unhappy about a couple things that have happened, even though they've gotten away with so much more. For the Capitals, all those things need to take a back seat to the main event. Game 7 of the series takes place at Verizon Center in Washington, DC tonight. However mistreated the Rangers may feel, they should "Expect No Mercy"!



Nazareth - "Expect No Mercy"

April 25, 2009

Hey John Tortorella, Have A Drink On Me

Since New York's pesky little jerk Sean Avery was a healthy scratch for last night's Game 5 of the playoffs between the Washington Capitals and the Rangers, the in game entertainment had to come from somewhere else.

Apparently, some fans gave Rangers coach John Tortorella (Inset NHL / Rangers file photo to left) a hard time. At one point, Tortorella threw a water bottle into the stands. Later, he was threatening the fans behind New York's bench with a hockey stick. It looked like he was trying to jam the stick through the plexiglass that separates the bench area from the stands. One of the hecklers may have thrown or poured a beer on Torts. The fan didn't appear to be wearing red (Caps' team color), and may have in fact been an unhappy Rangers fan. The "gentleman" was eventually escorted out of the building.



AC/DC -"Have A Drink On Me"

March 25, 2009

Bite Me, Bitch!

This is a tale of an estranged wife going to toothy extremes in an effort to force her former husband Robert Drawbough (Fairfield, CT) to reconcile with her. Beleive it or not, it's a true story.

Apparently, 37 year old Helen Sun (Inset photo) thought handcuffs and violence were the answer to her marital problems. I'm not sure how she imagined this was going to work. It seems she thought if she made him talk to her, he would take her back. I think the ship has sailed on that one now.


From CBS News (click here for full article):

In his call to 911, Drawbough tries to explain to the dispatcher what his wife has done to him.

"My wife has handcuffed me and I need some assistance," he first says. "She's handcuffed me and she's attacking me and I have not done anything to her. She has a record of violence, please come and help me get out of here!"

When the dispatcher asks him if he can free himself from his wife, he desperately screams, "No, she's handcuffed herself to me, please send police!"

Later in the call, Drawbough begins screaming in pain and tells the dispatcher his wife is biting him. The dispatcher then asks him why she would do this to him.

Drawbough: "Because I divorced her and tried leaving, and [screams in pain multiple times]."

Dispatcher: "What is she doing that's making you--"

Drawbough: "She's biting my arm!"

Finally, about three minutes into the call, police arrive and kick down the door to his Fairfield home. They freed Drawbough from his wife and arrested her.

Drawbough was treated at a local hospital for bite marks and scratches to his torso and arms.


Listen To Recording Of 911 Call From Handcuffed Husband (WARNING: Offensive Language).

February 23, 2009

Penguins Vs Capitals 02/22/2009 Review

Alex Ovechkin scores on Marc-Andre Fleury with his first shot on goal.
Photo by Pablo Martinez Monsivais / AP Photo.

Penguins 2 - Capitals 5

The Washington Capitals may have momentarily stumbled on Friday when they hosted the Colorado Avalanche, but they clearly frustrated the hell out of Sidney Crosby and the Pittsburgh Penguins in yesterday's third straight victory over Pennsylvania's biggest crybabies.

The NBC Sports announcers presenting the game may have wrongfully called Crosby a "nice" guy, but they also finally and rightfully called Alex Ovechkin the "best player in the NHL by far". Sidney Crosby could be seen continuously spouting rubbish throughout the entire game toward Ovechkin and his mates on the ice and at the bench. Obviously, bad feelings were flowing both ways. Fortunately for us Caps fans, our guys usually don't also play dirty, like the whinny little windbag Crosby and some of his teammates. The referees sure seemed bent on making it look the other way round, but the outcome of the game should wash away most of those mistakes. Enough ranting! On with the important stuff.

Washington had the game sewn up about 21 minutes after the first puck drop. The Capitals got power play goals from Alex Ovechkin and Alexander Semin in the first period, with Maxime Talbot netting Pittsburgh's first tally between those strikes. The Pen's managed a power play goal of their own from Sergei Gonchar at 4:46 in the second period, but the game winner for the Caps was already scored by Sergei Fedorov just 56 seconds into the period.

Shaone Morrisonn and Brooks Laich gave Washington a couple of insurance goals later in the second period. The goal by Morrisonn was his 3rd of the season. Laich's goal, which he banked off starting Pens goalie Marc-Andre Fleury through a grapefruit sized gap between Fleury and the goal post, was his 14th. It also led to Pittsburgh switching to Mathieu Garon in net, but the damage had already been done.

All the Caps seemed to be ready for this match up. They played with energy the whole 60 minutes. Jose Theodore made 31 stops between the pipes. The power play worked well. The penalty kill may have been used a little more often than one would like, but things went right on that end as well.

I have to admit I did enjoy watching Ovechkin teasing Crosby. After Sid crosschecked him high in the back while in front of the Capitals' bench, bending him over the half wall near the end of the second period, Ovie kept his cool. He simply put his arm around Crosby's shoulders and passed along what I'm sure were compliments on Sid's fine, yet relatively unproductive play. After Crosby wrangled away from Ovechkin, they both headed to their benches. Ovie waved bye-bye and then added a flapping chicken gesture as time ran out on the period. Ahh yes, very entertaining game.



Ovechkin and Crosby chat near end of second period.
This video was obviously mixed by a Penguins fan.
"Alex Ovechkin Roughs Up / Taunts Sidney Crosby [Feb 22, 2009]"
I found the "Roughs Up" part of the title very funny.

February 2, 2009

Michael Phelps - Up In Smoke

News Of The World - February 1, 2009.

Michael Phelps is in a bit of hot water today. Water that is much hotter than in any pool the US Olympic superstar has ever swam in before. News Of The World published a story yesterday about his antics while partying in November of 2008, along with a picture of the Towson, Maryland native sucking on a bong.

The high times of Phelps happened just two and a half months after his record breaking performance at the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics. His days as a role model may be up in smoke, but will this revelation totally ruin him? I doubt it. At 23 years old, he's got plenty of time to do PR repairs, and it's not like getting caught being a bad boy has hurt him before. He was arrested in Salisbury, MD for DUI in 2004, at the age of 19. There have been other pictures circulated of Phelps involved in compromising but legal positions since then as well.

News Of The World and others have also reported on Phelps' apology and promise not to let it ever happen again. I don't know how sincere his apology is, and I doubt it's the last time he'll screw up. He's still a very young man and only human. Phelps does take part in honorable activities and started up the Michael Phelps Foundation, which advocates swimming for children and promotes water safety.



Cheech And Chong - "Up In Smoke" 1978 movie trailer.


Marc Bolan and T.Rex - "Bang A Gong (Get It On)" in US.
Song known as "Get It On" in rest of world.

January 3, 2009

Crosby, The Asstounding All-Star


I can't believe I'm writing a post about the jerkwad known as Sidney Crosby, but here it is. Don't worry. It's not just about Crosby, and I'll keep it short. Basically, just pointing out the thoughts of a few fellow bloggers, in light of the results of this season's stupid NHL All-Star voting.

Sidney Crosby won first place, breaking the previous record number of votes. Well, good for him. However, Alex Ovechkin didn't even make the starting lineup. That's right. The league's best player will be watching from the bench when the game starts. What the fv[%? The whole process is a joke, with unlimited voting. Lets face it. The basically no real contact allowed policy of the modern day All-Star game makes it a pretty boring event these days anyway.

Over at Caps Blue Line, DMG posted a couple videos that made me think two nicknames for Crosby could easily be "Nut Job" and "Puss On Skates". Meanwhile, Dan Steinberg, of D.C. Sports Bog fumes over the All-Star voting mockery. Finally, check out Washington Capitals head coach Bruce Broudreau's comments on the matter, via Tarik El-Bashir's Capitals Insider.

March 9, 2008

Penguins Vs Capitals 03/09/2008 Review

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What a disappointing loss for the Washington Capitals. Although there were a few bad calls and a few missed calls, unlike yesterday's game against the Boston Bruins, the game was not literally handed to the opposition by the officials. Rather, it was a few misplays and mental lapses by Cap's who otherwise played extremely well against the Pittsburgh Penguins today.
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You knew, coming into this game, that it would be a very physical one. These two teams obviously hate each other. All the Capitals were hitting Penguins every chance they got in the first period. My personal favorite was the Shaone Morrisonn hit on Sidney Crosby. Washington also outshot Pittsburgh 11-4. They got plenty of time in the offensive zone, especially at the end of the first. However, they did not get the puck past Pittsburgh's netminder Marc-Andre Fleury.
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The Capitals continued to play with a high level of energy in the second period. Early in the period, Viktor Kozlov hit pipe with a hard shot. His reward would be an uncalled slash by a Penguin. Brooks Laich, who has been playing really well lately, gave up the body in front of Caps' goalie Cristobal Huet to block a shot. In the Penguins' end shortly after that, Alexander Semin took the puck across the ice and shot it toward the net. Laich was at the front of the net to deflect it in, putting the Cap's on the scoreboard first. That makes two games in a row that Brooks got the first goal of the game, both on the power play. But, Pitt's Petr Sykora answered back just over a minute later. His shot barely got through Huet, who should've been able to stop it easily. That would be Huet's only real mistake of the game. At 12:19, Washington's Shaone Morrisonn got called for tripping on a Pascal Dupuis dive. But, the Cap's killed off the penalty. Of course, the league doesn't like to see Sidney Crosby get called for penalties. So, when he made sure he bumped into Cristobal Huet while skating through Washington's crease, there was no call.
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If you watched the game on NBC, I hope you remembered to have a bucket or a large barf bag at the ready. Dick Doc Emerick and Eddie Upchuck Olczyk have to be the worst announcers in the business. Toward the end of the second period, an "interesting" question (among other things) was brought up. Edso, as the great Joe Beninati refers to him (though he's probably thinking of a similar sounding term - a$$#0!<) was asked who is better defensively, Sidney Crosby or Alex Ovechkin? Olczyk said that Crosby was slightly better because he's a center, while Ovechkin is a winger. What?....uhhh.....What?
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Getting back to reality and the last few moments of the second period, the game's intensity keep on going. It was exciting when Washington's forward Matt Bradley got a breakaway. It was infuriating when he was hauled down after his shot at the net, with no penalty called. Equally upsetting was Crosby's five hole goal, shot off an Evgeni Malkin rebound. Within the last 1:05 of period two, Capitals' center Nicklas Backstrom drew a crosscheck penalty from Pitt's Hal Gill and a roughing (elbow) penalty from Brooks Orpik. Alex Semin made good use of the 5 on 3 advantage, with a PP goal 13.2 seconds before the end of the period. Semin showed great patience, going back and forth between backhand and forehand. Even though Fleury was waiting for the shot, Alex flicked in the wrister so fast that he could only look behind himself in disbelief. After two periods, the Cap's were still ahead in most stats. However, much like the 2-2 score, the hit totals were about even.
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About six minutes into the third period is when Cap's defenseman Tom Poti did something which looked odd to me. Deep in Washington's end, he basically let Crosby skate by him like he was a teammate. Plehhh!...Phleehhh!....Uuuhhh. Where's that barf bag?! Please excuse that. I'm back now. Luckily, when the puck inevitably got to Sid and he drove to the net, Huet was a brick wall this time. Poti played exceptionally, otherwise. Both goalie Huet and defenseman John Erskine then thwarted scoring attempts from Pitt's Tyler Kennedy, Maxime Talbot and eventually Jordan Staal. Then, Pittsburgh was given a gift by a referee who called a penalty on Washington's Quintin Laing for a supposed knee on knee infraction. It was B.S. when it was called on Matt Cooke yesterday, and it was B.S. when it was called on Laing today! Nothing came of it. But, the continually bad officiating has just kept on showing up around the league since the beginning last season. After blocking another shot with his body, Laich cleared the puck.
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It was a shame the Cap's couldn't score after a Penguins' too many men on the ice penalty. But, the biggest shame of the whole game happened with 28.4 seconds left in the third period. Nicklas Backstom was standing by the net when the puck found it's way to him. He swung his stick in the wrong direction while attempting to clear it, sending the puck right by a surprised Cristobal Huet. Crosby got credit for the goal, since it was decided by the scoring officials that he was the last Penguin to touch the puck. One glaring mistake in an otherwise brilliant game by the Capitals' rookie center. A couple degrees more to the right, and it could have been a game saving play. Down by one and with less than half a minute left in regulation, Huet was pulled from Washington's net for the extra skater. I so desperately hate this move with every last fiber of my soul! It almost never works, especially for the Cap's. Inevitably, Staal scored the empty net goal with 13 seconds left on the clock.
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Another nationally televised loss for the Capitals. Which, almost automatically means another loss to the Penguins. Another loss at a chance for two more standings points. Was it a loss of their final chance at making a run for the playoffs this season? I hope not. But, it sure doesn't help.
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All Photos - Linda Spillers / AP

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